Repertory

From my teens to early adulthood, I have struggled with vasovagal syncope. It is a condition where the nervous system that regulates heart rate and blood pressure malfunctions in response to a trigger or traumatic event and causes a fainting spell. I wanted this piece to embody what it feels like to experience syncope: tunnel vision, the feeling of impending doom setting in. Something feels horribly wrong and you can't exactly pinpoint what. Your body is telling you to shut down in order to protect you. You'll see this panic throughout the first section of the dance. The second section represents what it feels like once you've lost consciousness. It's a dreamlike world, time stands still, and you're not really sure if you're awake or not. If you've ever experienced vasovagal syncope, it can be difficult to figure out what triggers your episodes and it's easy to feel like you have no control over how your body will react in certain situations. I have thankfully worked with some wonderful therapists (talk therapy and EMDR) to help manage my own situation and "reprogram" my brain in a way to prevent setting off the triggers.